Self-awareness. This is probably one of the most difficult one as it’s difficult looking into a mirror to see yourself as others do. I can see myself, but it takes a lot of work — and not to mention amazing friends — to tell you what you don’t want hear. One question I’ve been challenged with and begun asking is, “who are you trying to impress?”
Behavior from Childhood
Another question: “what behavior from my childhood is seeping into my actions today?” I heard a speaker give examples of successful CEOs that made rash decisions because of childhood tendencies. It made complete sense in their heads since that’s how they made decisions from their childhood. Example: successful female CEO leads a nonprofit through much growth…but when there is fighting on the board for the next strategic steps…she resigns. Why? Whenever her parents would fight, should would take flight and run.
So what behavior from my childhood is dictating my actions? How do I see those? How do I overcome? Low self awareness can cause repeat issues and doing the same mistakes I made as a kid….Am I tethered to the decisions I made as a kid? In cases, yes. In others, I’ve grown. But what are they?
We all have them. Most of us have three. If anyone doesn’t have a blind spot, I’ve been told they have four. I think I am excelling in an area and then find out (likely through one or more friends) that I’m failing. Miserably. That’s why having honest, true friends is such a crucial issue for leaders. Without them, we fall.
Without knowing my blind spots and being aware of my childhood tendencies, that will ruin relationships. Let us not allow these to ruin our wonderful relationships we’ve spent so much time cultivating!
It demands feedback from friends. “Tell me the brutal truth. Do you think I have some blind spots? What would they be? Don’t edit them”. When our friends answer us, don’t fear. These are coming from people who are rooting for you. They are cheering you on and want to see you succeed.
Fail. But fail fast and learn. Grow. See this as a journey and not a scantron exam to try and ace. We will never ace is because people are messy, but being a terrific leader can create real change.
Originally published at www.jeffreybeaumont.com.